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This is the girlie drink you ought to make:

Cosmopolitan

• 2 parts cranberry juice cocktail
• 2 parts triple sec
• 1 part vodka
• 1 part lime juice

Shake with cracked ice; strain into chilled cocktail glass.

Some notes:

Always use fresh lime juice.

If you skip or skimp on the fresh-squeezed lime juice, ice, or shaking, you are not following directions and you will screw it up.

The vodka and triple sec proportions were inverted from the original recipe. The different tastes are better balanced this way, especially if you use Cointreau. Using more vodka makes it smell like your drunk Auntie.

Here’s a cocktail recipe from Burma:

Pegu

• 2 parts gin
• 1 part triple sec
• 1 part lime juice
• 2 dashes Angostura bitters

Shake with cracked ice; strain into chilled cocktail glass.

Some notes:

Always use fresh lime juice.

Cocktail recommends stirring this cocktail. Yet their write-up on stirring vs. shaking recommends shaking when dealing with “complex” ingredients, such as bitters. They also say “you almost never shake clear drinks,” but the Pegu is not a clear drink. Go ahead and shake it.

Cocktail also recommends Cointreau, but it’s bloody expensive ($40/L). Regular triple sec is better bang for your buck ($11/L), though if you have the cash, by all means go with Cointreau.

Cocktail also lists 3 parts gin instead of 2. I have used the recipe above with pleasant results.

Finally, I’ve frequently misquoted Cocktail by saying that the Pegu makes one surly. In point of fact, Cocktail says the Pegu makes them saucy. In my experience, you might get either result.