StudioGlyphic

The PokerStars tournament was a lot of donkey calls and impatient plays on my part. I happened to get lucky a few times, and rightfully punished a few more, and ended getting knocked out in 262nd place.

Thanks, F-Train. But I noticed one of the things missing from your list of seven things about you was the origin of Asphynxma.

Moving on…

1. Whenever we passed a 7-Eleven in the car, my brother used to announce that he was going to say “Seven” to mark the occasion. Upon hearing this, I would shout “Seven!” to my great amusement and his great distress. I still take pleasure in the psychological suffering of others today.

2. I was student body president of my elementary school. I did not use the veto or pardon powers one might associate with the office.

3. I went to Beverly Hills High School, but never had the opportunity to bitch-slap neither Brenda nor Brendon, as they were fictional characters. Nor did I stalk Angelina Jolie Voight, whom I have recently concluded is a fictional character in her own right.

4. I wasted most of my college years online figuring out this Internet-thingy. All of my real jobs are a direct result of that time-wasting. Now I help today’s college kids to waste time looking at girls online. I expect that in ten years the most prolific pornographers and Peeping Toms will owe me some thanks, and a few photos.

5. The Internet wasn’t the reason I was suspended from college my senior year, but it did give me something to do.

6. I’ve taken the MCAT, LSAT, and GMAT, and applied to medical school, law school, and business school, but I am not a doctor, laywer, nor douchebag. Okay, maybe I am the latter, but I didn’t learn it in school for $40k a year!

7. I think MySpace sucks. My job is to make it suck less.

And I tag…

Iggy
Grubby
-EV
Hank
fhwrdh

Because they are either mysterious, secretive, or infrequent posters (thus ending this tagging nonsense).

And…

Poker Gnome

Because he still reminds me of Robert Wagner.

And finally…

Fact Girl

Because her writing makes me happy.

I wrote a letter to my representative in the House. I modified the PPA template and sent it from the form on house.gov. I hope he doesn’t mind if I share our personal correspondence:

To the Honorable Henry Waxman,

As a voter in your district, I am writing to ask you to support and co-sponsor HR 2046 – the Internet Gambling Regulation and Enforcement Act of 2007, sponsored by Rep. Barney Frank, and referred to the House Committee on Energy and Commerce.

In 2006, the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act (UIGEA) was introduced at the 11th hour as an amendment to the SAFE Port Act without debate on its merits. As no Congressional representative worth his or her political salt would vote against the SAFE Port Act, the UIGEA slipped through and was signed into law by Mr. Bush, effectively gutting the online gaming industry’s presence here in the United States. The methodology of the Republican leadership, and the blatant attempt to appeal to the conservative right-wing of its party, disgusted me and much of poker-playing America, regardless of political affiliation. It was seen as an assault on personal liberties by a minority’s definition of morality.

Now that the Democrats have gained control of both houses, there is an opportunity to correct the mistakes of the previous majority party in the form of HR 2046. If HR 2046 passes into law, online poker and other forms of gaming would become safe, secure, and regulated. The bill creates stringent licensing regulations for operators, so it will protect players from fraud and other risks.

The bill also has rigorous protections against illegal gambling, underage gambling, and compulsive gambling. However, the bill does not force any state to accept online gaming – it will simply allow any currently legal gaming to take place online. States and sports leagues can opt out completely if they wish.

Bringing online gaming under the supervision and regulation of the US government also creates great financial opportunties in terms of both tax revenues and licensing fees. As it is, the United States receives nothing of online gaming revenues. In fact, gaming revenues from Americans are going overseas to countries like Gibraltar, Antigua, and Bermuda.

Tax revenues and global trade issues aside, online gaming represents high growth, high-paying jobs. As a leader in technology, California would benefit disproportionately from the legalization and regulation of online gaming. This $13b high-tech, cutting edge industry needs software developers, network engineers, marketing managers, sales representatives–the whole gamut. It is a fact that one such software development house moved its Westwood headquarters overseas due to the uncertain and increasingly risky business climate within our borders. We need those jobs and the money they inject into the local economy.

I hope you will agree with me on the importance of passing HR 2046 into law and help Rep. Frank by co-sponsoring and supporting this bill. I look forward to your actions on this matter.

Sincerely,
glyphic

I also sent him my affiliate links for PokerStars and FullTilt. Sorry, Mr. Waxman, but no rakeback for you.

Just received this today from the Poker Player’s Alliance:

Dear Fellow PPA Member:

I have wonderful news to report! On Thursday, April 26, Rep. Barney Frank introduced HR 2046, the Internet Gambling Regulation and Enforcement Act of 2007. HR 2046 will lift the prohibition on playing poker online. Your efforts are making a difference!

Representative Frank is the Chairman of the important House Financial Services Committee. And he understands the injustice that we have suffered. When he introduced the bill, he told reporters that “The existing legislation is an inappropriate interference on the personal freedom of Americans and this interference should be undone”.

But he can’t do this job alone. Now, we need to help Congressman Frank build support for his bill.

You can regain your right to enjoy safe, secure online poker – but only if you stand up for your rights. And PPA is here to help you do just that.

This is a landmark day for freedom. But it is only the first step of the process. Join me in celebrating this milestone – and take action to build support for HR 2046.

Click here or below to make your voice heard in our nation’s Capitol.

Sincerely,
Michael Bolcerek
President
Poker Players Alliance

Please take a few minutes to write your Congressman using the form provided by the PPA above. Even a douchebag Congressman will do the right thing if he knows his constituents are watching.

In a post-UIGEA world, which do you prefer? Why?

Got home safely, and with minimal hassle (my flight was only delayed by half an hour), but I’m feeling a little burnt out on the whole Vegas thing. I think I would have been just as happy to have stayed home this weekend. But that’s likely due to the fact that I missed having the girl around, not to mention having gone through a hell of a week at the world’s largest social networking site. Next time I’ll bring the wife and take a day off.

While I doubt I would have done any blogging in the past two weeks if I didn’t have a Wii to suck up all my time, I’m pretty sure I would have been looking for something pokery to do. As it was, I got my clammy hands on a Nintendo Wii the night before Thanksgiving thanks to a very cool guy I work with, and didn’t put down the controls until I’d beaten the new Zelda game. Even then I decided to look up some nifty strategy guides over at Gamespot and try out some of the things I hadn’t figured out on my own.

This coming weekend, however, will likely give me my fill of pokery things for a little while to come. With the women out of town or otherwise preoccupied, Absinthe and I will be sharing a room over at the Jihad Casino and Resort Hotel. I don’t expect to use it much. And I suppose I’ll participate in this Caesars tournament that’s going on, too. It’s too bad that the future Mrs. Glyphic won’t be there, because I feel she adds a certain tilt factor that almost assuredly works in my favor. Then again, I think Bill’s the blogger most likely to appreciate the tilt, and from what I can tell, he won’t be joining us this time around.

See you there.

“Sorry, server too loaded, please try again between 3am and 7pm EST.”
–Party Cashier, October 11, 2006

Good thing I submitted my withdrawal request this morning. It’s really a shame, too, since the Bad Beat Jackpot stands at just over $400k right now.

I hate the Party Poker sounds. They stress me out. Full Tilt Poker’s client, on the other hand, has subtle, soothing sounds. Since it looks like we’ll still be able to play online for a little while yet, try replacing the Party sound files with the FTP sounds, or any other wav files of your choosing.

You will most likely find the FTP and Party sound files here:

C:\Program Files\Full Tilt Poker\Waves

C:\Program Files\PartyGaming\PartyPoker

Copy the files you want to use into the PartyPoker folder and rename them to correspond with the files you want to replace. I chose addchips.wav, cards_dealing.wav, chimes.wav, and reminder.wav, since these are the most obnoxious and frequently used sounds. Have fun!